There are certain habits that benefit us and bring joy and success into our life. At the same time, other habits drag us down and keep us unhappy. In this article, I will outline 12 habits that have a positive impact on our lives. If we do not follow them one day we will regret it. Here are those 12 things you will regret not doing right now.
Not Listening to your Heart
Listening to your heart is important because it is the heart that feels all the emotions. If the heart is not content it does not matter how much money or success you have. You will not be happy. There are some people who achieve immense success and find themselves totally unsatisfied with their lives.
However, agreeing with your heart does not mean you follow everything it asks you to do. In my experience, when your heart is living in fear, trusting it will not be beneficial. But you need to listen to it and understand that it lives in fear. Find the causes behind it and do something about it. If you can’t overcome the fear you may need the help of a counselor.
Anyway, the bottom line is that you need to listen to it and understand it. Ignoring it is never the way to go.
Not Saying No
Most people have a habit of not being able to say no. Especially, if the question is asked multiple times. This is usually due to a fear of rejection which is derived from lack of self confidence.
First, you need to understand that just because you do everything they ask you to do they are not going to like you. Actually, in most cases, people will look down on you for being a doormat. Also, they will get into the habit of just using you to get things done but not reciprocating the same level of respect that they give to others. In short, people don’t respect a person who doesn’t respect himself.
If you have ever felt that people respect your favors less than other people’s favors then this may be the reason. You can spend the lifetime doing one favor after another but they are not going to respect you unless you respect yourself. You will probably see that someone else does one favor and they become the other person’s Biggest Fan even though after doing thousands of favors they don’t treat you the same way.
Related article: 12 powerful reasons why self-care is not selfish
Not Believing in Yourself
Most people find it difficult to believe in themselves, especially if they had parents or teachers that did not believe in them. Harsh criticism can take your self confidence away. Every child is born with self confidence. They think they can do everything. It is the people around us who point out what we can do and what we can’t do and when they do it in a harsh way the child loses all the self confidence that he or she was born with.
There are several reasons why you need to believe in yourself. One reason is that no one else will believe you unless you believe in yourself. Another reason is that everything flows much more easily when you believe in yourself. The moment you start doubting you start feeling confused and anxious. Constantly feeling such feelings can later lead to mental issues.
Therefore it is very important to bring back that self confidence that you had when you were just a baby. One thing that I did to revive the self confidence that I used to have as a child was to make decisions and stick to it without overthinking. In the beginning, you should start with simple decisions like what you are going to wear or what you are going to eat. After some time of practicing this, you will feel that you can make bigger and bolder decisions with relative ease. I have outlined other things that you can do to improve your confidence in my article on confidence building activities.
Not Standing up for Yourself
This is a must have quality if you want to be happy in life. People have the tendency to let out their frustration on people who had nothing to do with it unless they stand up for themselves. When they know that no matter what they say you will not speak up for yourself they have no reason to think twice before talking to you in a disrespectful manner. Therefore, it is very important to stand up for yourself and set good boundaries.
Not Prioritizing your Happiness over Others Feelings
This doesn’t seem surprising since we live in a world in which we regard self-sacrifice as an honorable thing to do. Out of the sheer need to feel liked and respected it is no wonder that we fall into this pattern of prioritizing other people’s feelings over our own. But, as I mentioned before, people don’t respect people who don’t respect themselves. So obviously all our efforts to become liked and respected would be in vain. The day you realize this you will regret not prioritizing your feelings over other people’s needs.
Not Following your Dreams
Wise people always tell you to follow your dreams. The fact that following your dreams will lead to success is no secret but it is heavily doubted. Parents and teachers often advise children to be practical and find a career that is stable even at the cost of their own happiness.
When you hear this over and over again, you are likely to feel that it is the best way to go. But it is at the end of your life that you realize that you have never been happy and never really lived because you sacrificed a large portion of your time doing things that you don’t enjoy.
Not Making your Own Choices
Many people have the habit of asking for another person’s opinion about their choices even when they are pretty confident about their choice. This comes from either a lack of confidence in themselves or the need to be validated and appreciated by others. However, if you choose to listen to other’s advice and change your choice you are highly likely to regret it later. How many times have you said to yourself I knew I shouldn’t have listened to her? And how many times have you doubted your own choice again and listen to the same person that you vowed not to listen to?
The bitter truth is that this pattern will not change until you let go of your insecurities and develop your confidence level. Feeling secure and confident is not going to happen magically. You have to put time and effort into developing that sense of security and self confidence. One way to do that is by doing the confidence building activities that I have recommended in my article on confidence building Activities.
Not Stepping outside of Your Comfort Zone
Outside your comfort zone is where all growth happens. If you don’t grow you will find yourself in the same place in the same situation Day After day. In fact, Tony Robbins says that if you don’t grow you begin to die. So if you never step out of your comfort zone one day in the future you will regret not achieving anything worthwhile in life.
Not Making Time for People you Love
There are a lot of people who get caught up in their work and forget about the people they love. If they get too stressed they develop a habit to take it out on their loved ones as well. However, it is at the end of one’s life that he or she would realize that people are more important than money. On the deathbed people look back at the people in their life and what they did and how much fun they had together not how much money they earned or how many awards they won. So if you don’t spend time with them there will be a day that you will most likely regret it.
Sometimes people let us down and we find it difficult to forgive them. The root cause of this is a sense of insecurity. ( see article: Signs of insecurity) However, if you put your ego aside and talk to that person you might realize that he or she did not purposely hurt you.
I have often seen people who were tough on their friends often find themselves in the same kind of situation later in life. Then they begin to wonder if their old friend also had a good reason for their behavior, just like they do now. It is at this point they will begin to regret not being open to forgiveness.
If that didn’t happen you are still likely to regret throwing away a great friendship as you mature and begin to understand more about what is truly important in life. However, it may be too late by then.
Not Doing things Imperfectly
Perfection is highly overrated. Striving to achieve perfection could actually Hinder your growth as a person. It also has the ability to create mental emotional problems in your life.
Some people don’t start doing anything just because you cannot get it perfect. They are right about that though. Perfection is an illusion and it can never be achieved because there is always a next level. Trying to achieve perfection can break you down mentally because you feel you are not achieving perfect results due to you being not good enough. However, the real reason is that perfection is not achievable. The problem is with your goal.
Therefore, it is a good idea to give up the idea of perfection and set more realistic and achievable goals.
Related article: 12 reasons why perfection is the dumbest standard on earth.